Meant to be. 

I’ve always thought I was destined to be something amazing, a star, a celebrity, famous. 

I’ve tried music… I can’t play the guitar that well although I did do fairly well as a DJ. My karaoke skills are on point, if I do say so myself, however I don’t think I was destined for anything with rhythm because lords knows I lack in that area. 

So I set myself up for being an amazing professional. Professional what? I’m not too sure yet. I’ve always done very well with business, I attained more goals than I even dreamt before I was 25 but that just wasn’t it. There had to be more. 

So I set myself abroad. I travelled alone, visiting many states and provinces all the while meeting people from all walks of life. I started blogging, I was writing for me and writing for all of you. I was doing what I loved, and loving every minute of it. 

I met my husband in Wyoming, in a small town called Cheyenne that resembles my home town of Calgary, Alberta in many ways. It just felt right. 

I wasn’t rich, famous, absorbing the instagram spotlight, or living amongst the stars, but I felt at home. Something I haven’t truly felt in years. Although I was “at home” or near my family so to speak, I didn’t feel like I was in the right place. I didn’t feel as thought I was where I was meant to be. 

27 days later I found myself married and starting the immigration process to become an American. Don’t get me wrong, this come with many trials and tribulations to say the least. I’ll save that for another blog post though as its a very long process with many many hiccups along the way. 

Back to the point. I was home. My husband isn’t perfect, but he’s perfect to me. I love him for all his amazing traits, and I love him more for his flaws. We all have them, let’s not be unrealistic. Home is where your heart is, I never truly understood that until I met Mr. K. We’re going to call him “K” for what it’s worth seeing as he’s not much of a social media guru like myself. He was home to me, and he always will be. 

I’ve learned a lot about myself in the past few months but the biggest thing I’ve come to realize is that, I am where I’m supposed to be. All the glitz and glamour that I dreamt would engulf my life… Well this is it. It may be a small town bar, an amazing friend that dresses like a pirate a week before Halloween (which I love because it’s my favorite day of the year,) a pint (sorry Canada I mean a mickey) of fireball and some Halloween classics like Hocus Pocus all alone on a Monday night while my hubby works away to provide for us, but that’s the razzle dazzle. 

Casper has finally met Wendy, and we are going to jäger bombs under the moonlight. Oh how romantic. I wouldn’t have it any other way. 

Sometimes it’s not what you imagined, it’s even better. You just have to see the stars before you judge them on their ability to shine. 

Love&Light, 

Jessica 

Immigrating for love. 

No one said it was going to be easy, who would have known that I’d go through all the trials and tribulations I’ve endured to be with the one I love. 

I’m not saying it isn’t worth it or that I would ever regret enduring the obstacles that life has put infront of myself and my husband, it’s just difficult at times. 

It’s hard to explain the homesick feeling that overwhelms me at times, or the frustrations I deal with on a daily basis. I miss those closest to me, the immigration process is difficult and prevents me from doing much more than house work. It’s hard not to feel like an outsider when you just don’t fit in. 

People complain about their jobs all the time, I know I certainly have in the past. I can honestly say I never thought I’d be jealous of others working, I want nothing more than to contribute to my household and feel useful. 

Those who have never moved countries would have no idea the difficulties and frustrations one feels through the lengthy process, I know I never did until now. 

So I sit, day after day waiting for the letter to arrive so I can feel normal again. 

Love&Light,

Jessica 

Thanksgiving. 

The American flag breezes through the window outside this diner. The wonderful smells of turkey, stuffing, sweet potatoes, and all the fixings of this Canadian holiday are non existent here. 

This year I have a lot to be thankful for;

My amazing husband, you are my rock and I am truly blessed to have you by my side. 

My family, you have been there for me when I needed you most but couldn’t admit it. You brought me back from the darkness that I surrounded myself with for far too long. I will forever be grateful to have you all in my life. 

Friends, the ones who have stuck by me I am very lucky to have you in my life. To the new friends I’ve met here in Wyoming, I love you guys as well. It’s never easy moving to a different country but you’ve definitely made it a lot better. 

Reflection. This year I am happy I have more opportunity to self reflect. I’ve seen a lot here in America, met many people, and thankfully I have made choices that reflect me as the person I want to be. 

Holidays are a time to be with your family, go into a food coma, and enjoy those precious moments we can cherish forever. 

To all my friends and family, I love you and I miss you, I hope you all enjoyed the day together and I can celebrate with you soon. 

Ps. Perkins is great, but it’s not the same as a hot turkey dinner. 

Love&Light, 

Jessica 

Shameynne aka Cheyenne. 

In my travels I’ve seen many places and many different ways of life but nothing quite like my new city of residence. Cheyenne, Wyoming. 

There’s a few things you ought to know before making the choice to move here. 

1. Nothing much happens before noon, which we also call lunch/beer break.

2. If you need to get ahold of someone make sure to call, email will be lost in the cloud forever and ever. 

3. There are requirements to living here; a beer mug (never empty) holsters for your gun and shot glass, and the number for the cowboy shuttle on speed dial. 

4. Fireball. Enough said. 

5.  Knowledge of the “one legged stripper” at the Green Door (which is a bar/strip club) 

6. Uber. It doesn’t exist here and if you mention it they’ll think you’re a hipster talking some foreign lingo. 

7. We refer to Colorado people as  “greenies” they are known for being the loudest when using our park/lakes. 

8. A snow day = a snow drift as high as your front door. 

9. “Regulars” at the bar are not your friend unless you’re paying their tab. They’re anything but “regular”

10. Uniqueness has a whole new meaning, it means you’re fucking weird. 

11. You’ll be lucky to meet a man with all his teeth.

12. Wyoming is a “right to work” state which means you can and will be fired for just being you. Although drunkness seems to be a daily occurrence you may not show up to work intoxicated. 

13. They do not have pizza pops nor do they know what they are (sorry Canada) 

14. If you’re a biker, it better be a Harley. If you ride a bicycle, watch out we don’t all know how to drive. 

15. Pedestrians. Watch out, they don’t know what a walking man sign means and you have no right of way. They will stop for a Pokemon though, even though they are few and far between. 

16. If you’re 18, no kids, and not pregnant… You’re not from here. “I just went camping” is not an excuse for pregnancy. 

17. If you’re reading this blog, you’re not from here… “Blog” is probably a name for a shot that you’ve never tried and never should. 

18. At McDonald’s they will not understand “make it like a Mac.” Which is putting Mac sauce, lettuce and all the fixings of a Big Mac but without the other bun. Don’t try it here, it’ll have ketchup and Mac sauce..nasty. 

19. Frontier days…. Needs its own blog post but it’s similar to the Calgary stampede only 100x smaller, although they will never admit to that. It’s “the biggest outdoor rodeo on earth” if you live here and you better stick to that.

20. Downtown. It has more parking garages than places to go. Open a restaurant down there and you’ll be lucky to last 6 months. Sorry Hooters. Open a skateboard park and you’ll be busy for life, but it’s illegal to ride a skateboard downtown. 

21. Photographers, ensure to take a deposit because your clients will definitely change dates, fail to show up to their session, or not end up paying you at all. Trying to get paid for your services is like waiting outside a bestbuy for the newest Xbox console. 

To be continued…

Love&Light,

Jessica 

Red|White|Blue

My wanderlust nature has brought me many exciting and exhilarating experiences over the years, but none quite like the last. 

Not only did I move to another country, I met the love of my life and married him 27 days later, but not before we went through hell and high water together. 

I’ll elaborate. 

While traveling the United States promoting positivity and sharing inspirational stories, I came across two appraisers from “Antiques Roadshow” whom I have posted a piece on previously. I happened to be traveling around Wyoming, and ended up in a quaint little place called Cheyenne. 

This is where I met Kyle, the love of my life. Our love story is my favorite, although untraditional and full of stories I can barely fathom myself, it’s ours. 

I thoroughly enjoyed being in Cheyenne, to the extent that I wanted to extend my stay. It reminded me of home although on a much smaller scale. The town is very western themed, the people were friendly, lots of cowboy themed art, and they even have their own version of the Calgary Stampede. I was curious, I wanted to see more and adventure around town, so I decided to stay for a week and be a tourist. 

It was a Monday night, I went to a popular bar in town which I had discovered a few days prior. I sat at the bar and made small talk with the bartender while I consumed a few beverages and chatted with other patrons. I suppose I didn’t think much of it at the time but looking back I can pinpoint the importance of those conversations. I had a gut feeling that I was truly where I was meant to be in those few hours at the bar, I felt different, I felt what home is supposed to feel like. I don’t believe that home is materialistic, I believe it’s a feeling that you get when all the things about your current situation align with your true path. 

As you may have already assumed, I’m very outgoing and friendly and I enjoy meeting new people, I’m not shy, timid, or afraid to speak my mind. So I spontaneously asked the bartender for his phone number, texted him “I love you” and then proceeded to kiss him and run out the front entrance. 

The next day I showed up to the bar at 11 am as this bartender had mentioned he was doing inventory and would be there all day. I sat next to him while he did the paperwork for inventory, we held hands, kissed, and talked about nothing all day long. Eventually he was finished with his paperwork so we had some drinks, hung out with his friends, and stayed up all night talking. We were inseparable. He asked me to marry him and move to Cheyenne to start our lives together. That gut feeling I had the night before still to this day resonates within me. We just knew, it was meant to be. 

The following day I began my long drive back to Canada, I was already a day late for work but I wasn’t worried about it at all. I had just met the love of my life and I was headed home to work for a few weeks so I could set off on my journey back to him. That’s exactly what I did. 

A few weeks passed, I saved some money, packed my car as full as I could, put the dog in and away we went at 6am. I should have been in Cheyenne 16 hours later, however that wasn’t quite the case. I’d put my fiancé and family through some pretty stressful and scary situations before I made it to Cheyenne the following Monday night…

To be continued.

Love & Light,

Jessica 

JT dreams too. 

Alright, first things first, I am not referring to Justin Timberlake. This post is about a man who is inspirational through his music and the stories he shares through lyrics. He’s been in the spotlight for years and I can personally say that he is humble, kind, and very friendly. 

My father worked for a music company when I was young, I was very fortunate to meet some amazing artists although truthfully I was too young to appreciate the wonderful gift that was bestowed upon me at the time. 

Photographs of artists like Shania and Jan Arden posed next to my father are a mere part of the decor in my parents home. 

I’ve always had a love for music and I would said it goes as far as being a passion. I learned to play the guitar, I love to sing, I taught myself how to mix music, and there is more than one occasion that I’ve gotten lost in lyrics and seen multiple days go by without notice. 

Last night I had the priveledge of seeing one of my all time idols with my father. This man is someone who I grew up listening to and is one of my fathers favorite artists, and mine as well. This man not only sang last night, he told jokes, stories, and I was lucky enough to meet him, exchange stories and even take some selfies. 

Who is this man, I’m sure you’re curious. His name is James Taylor and in 1968 when he sang “something in the way she moves” for Paul McCartney and George Harrison he had a dream about being signed by a label. The Beatles record label “Apple Records” signed him and gave him the shot to be the astounding musician he is today. 

Prior to being signed, James had a band called “Original Flying Machine” which seemingly crashed and burned before his opportunity at stardom. His parents had grown tired of him lounging around the house all day so he set off and at that time whilst dealing with the pains of missing home he wrote and recorded my all time favorite song “Carolina.”

This just goes to show, no matter how small you feel in this world with a plethora of people and their dreams, yours may come true to. You just have to work for it. 

Thank you James Taylor for a wonderful show last with your All Star Band. You left the crowd with memories of a fantastic evening and many laughs. One of my dreams was to meet you, last night we crossed that off the bucket list. Enjoy your Caesar, glad I got to teach you about my favorite beverage. 

Love&Light,

Jessica 

BE THAT WOMAN – Guest Post 

Throughout my travels I always seem to attract people who have a story to share, unbeknownst to me while surfing through Instagram I came across a profile I just couldn’t ignore. 

I never could have dreamt up the story that I’m about to share from a wonderfully inspiring and influential woman. Sade Travers is the author of this next piece and she is nothing less that truly amazing. I’m very proud to say that she more than willingly wrote a piece to contribute to The Basic Bish and it is my pleasure to share this with you. 

Thank you Sade, your words are so motivating and captivating. My greatest gratitude goes to you for sharing your story.

Guest post by Sade Travers of “Be That Woman”

“When I was younger I knew I wanted to help people, I wanted to be the person that I needed when I was younger and trying to figure my life out. I had huge dreams and ambitions and I didn’t know how to get to where I wanted to be.

As a fitness trainer I spent a lot of my time talking to women and listening to the things they say about their dreams and about their desires. Also about their aspirations for having the perfect life, the perfect body, and the happiest life. I found I was offering a lot of advice which my clients and friends found very useful- from there it all kind of just evolved.

I had the talent for sharing my advice that women could relate to, because I just “got it”, I understood on a deep level what they were trying to say, and what they needed to here. I am very intuitive in nature so I think that plays in my favour.

I spent years working on myself after that, discovering who I wanted to be and what I was going to do with this desire of helping women. I have read hundreds of books, invested money on self-development programs and grown as a person through my own life experiences.

Last year when I was 26 I was diagnosed with Hodgkins Lymphoma, which is a cancer of the lymphatic system. It took me and my entire world by surprise- as you can imagine! Funnily enough it threw me deeper into the depths of self-discovery through the process, which enabled me to see how strong and powerful I really was. I used the power of positive thinking as well as allowing as much love into my life to help me get through what was the toughest time of my life.

I created a blog (www.sade-travers.squarespace.com) to provide support and love to those around the world who were going through the same thing and give them a literal shoulder to lean on. From here my love of writing was formed and I had email after email of people telling me they were moved by what I wrote and even though some of them did not have cancer they found something compelling in my writing- this motivated me even more to share my message.

I came up with Be That Woman near the end of my cancer journey- something that I knew I needed in my life to give me purpose. It was a dream I had, which I actioned on and turned it into a reality!

The message of Be That Woman is all about empowering women to live life boldly and to love boldly- both themselves and others. It’s all about banishing the self-doubt and just going for it!

Creating Be That Woman has given me a chance to express the real me, to share the vulnerable sides of me to allow me to show up in the world more authentically. To have had to trust my decisions and to push myself further into love and life than I ever thought possible. I do not want to die with my message still inside me- that I know to be true.

I have faced challenges while on this journey, most of which have been created by myself. My self-doubt and the lack of faith I have in myself has sometimes left me feeling very vulnerable about sharing the deepest parts of me. But, I always need to remind myself that there is someone out there who NEEDS to hear what I have to say- and that is why I keep going.

I want to be the example that anyone can change the world, that anyone can make a HUGE difference in so many people’s lives- just by being you.”

Love&Light,

Jessica 

Hear me roar. 

I am a girl, yes. I can be girlie, yes. I love football, beer, fixing cars, motocross, and I golf almost every weekend. Should this make me any less of a woman? No. 

My friends are dudes, girls don’t generally like me. I am a carpenter currently by trade, I like to fix things. I like to have an understanding of how things work. I don’t get my nails done, I don’t have fake hair or fake boobs, I’m just a girl. A girl who loves to travel, meet people, hear their stories, spread positive vibes and be “out there.” Don’t call me on Super Bowl Sunday because it’s the Super Bowl, clearly I’m busy. 

I don’t go to church, and I don’t always listen to my parents. Quite frankly, they think I’m crazy. I’ve never been one to “go with the status quo.” I am who I am and nothing will change that. 

I feel bad for women who live their lives with a side of caution, scared of being who they truly are because they’re afraid they won’t be liked. Yes I have my challenges when I have to explain to a boyfriend that my friends are 99% male but it’s a challenge I accept. This is my life and those who are not willing to be understanding of it, have no place in it. 

A long time ago I decided to stop being a people pleaser and start living my life the way I see it fit. This brings me great joy and I love every moment of it. 

Just remember. A wise man once said “those who mind don’t matter, and those who matter, don’t mind.” 

Words to live by. Be who you are and say what you feel. Life is a journey, not a destination. We should ALL grasp this concept because in the end, we all have the same destination, you’ll never make it out alive. We’re all living, but are we? 
Love&Light, 

Jessica